WISHES

Its just a thought,

to live by the sea

more peacefully.

Its just a wish,

to live a day

more simply.

Its just a dream,

to live my life

more calmly.

Its just a prayer,

to live with the world

more cheerfully.

A wish, a thought, some dreams, few prayers;

a life taken for granted,

a life lived with care.

to decipher its meaning

might make life a mystery unaware,

to live with feelings

will make life a treat hard to spare.

Thence, live life with

a wish, a thought, some dreams and few prayers!!!!

a FRIEND that was

Now that you are gone,
Why do you have to sill come back
silently in my dreams.
Now that you are gone
Why do you have to still wake me up
with a quite scream.

We were friends,
Oh! don't you remember.
It was us that made the world,
till there were sparks of ember.

I never wanted you to go,
It has killed me within.
Though I breath for myself now,
But its to you that I owe my being.

It was you,
It was me,
Just us it was all about.

Then what was it that went wrong?
Why did I think of us going all along?
Why had I tendered the seeds of friendship,
never knowing they had thorns.

You are gone
gone for ever.
Then why do you have to still come back
silently in my dreams
and wake me up with a quiet scream!

Unforgotten

Mum, why do you send me to school?
a place i hardly know.
From the cocoon of your love,
it will be difficult for me to go
And write a future
into the world unknown.

But with heavy sighs and heavy cries
I was sent to make new friends.
And friends I did make,
OH! the future took shape.

Laughing and giggling the time flew by
Carefree, as I was, I realized,
Growing up could never be fun,
Without those lectures and those bunks

The nights were spent studying in hell
And the mornings followed listening to teachers yell,
Libraries were for reading faces,
Hours of detention after classes,
Man it will never return, will it?

With secrets prevalently kept
And firdt love love all abrest
Started the new phase of life amid friends
We got closer
Thought we understood the future.
Together it was fun
And time flew by with a pun.

It was then,
The call of separation finally ordained.
With tears of sorry we finally affianced,
When i said,
MUM! thanks for sending me to school
A place where my heart is there.

ACCIDENT

It seems as if you are watching a movie stunt and as the adrenalin takes the best of you, you close your eyes with a hope that when you open them you’ll actually be in a movie hall. But the worst always happens, and as you open your eyes you can see it clearly happening in front of you…you can hear the screams…feel the panic…and listen to the CRASH.

How many times has it happened that you have witnessed a real accident happening live?? I mean the ones you see in-action in the movies actually happening in reality to someone real. Someone who is just like you and me, someone who has a family, some friends, and many responsibilities, who has a life of his own to live. Spooky it is!! And it takes the hell out of you.
It’s been more than a month now, but the calls of help and the blood and broken car with a hand hanging out still visit me in my dreams. We were in Massoori then. It was the first night halt of our 15 days long road trip into the Gharwals. At around 10 in the night, after starting our day at 6 in the morning, we reached our hotel, got fresh and sat by the balcony, hungry little beings dreaming of the appetizing dinner being cooked just for us. DRRRRR BOOOOOOOOM CRRRAAASHHH CCCCRRRRRRRR…
-What was that???
-Sounds like someone’s bursting crackers!!
-Who in the world would want to burst crackers so late in the night??? It’s already past 11…..
-SHHHH!! Watch out… see the lights rolling down??? BLOOOOODDDY a cars falling off the cliff!!!
-WHA….???? OH MY GOD!!!
It rolled on and on for about 4 minutes, continuing to make those horrific cracklings!!! And it all happened on the cliff which had a clear visibility from the place where we were standing. I could clearly see the head lights rolling down the mountain slope, the white metal body hiding itself from time to time behind the bushes and trees and suddenly there was pin drop silence…. The silence beckoning fury. And in about a second or two there was a long, shrilling, continuous blow of the horn. The cries of help are still very vivid in my ears. “PLEASE HELP! TAKE ME OUT OF HERE! IM STUCK!” people wailing and shouting!!!
On pure instincts, we rushed to the spot from where the car had fallen. It was a five minutes run. The trackers were already on their way down the cliff to trace the car and check for causalities. The wailing hadn’t yet stopped. Well at least we had the assurance that people were alive, but to think of the condition they might be in made us shudder. After all they had a good nice fall of about 50ft. There was a small crowd gathered around panicking and trying to make up stories about the car. It was getting eerier specially after having heard a local myth about how the dead haunt the city after they fall of a mountain. Enough to scare your guts out!!! Plus the cries actually weren’t stopping. My legs wanted to run but my brain commanded them to stay, to be curious and wait to see the causalities.
Half an hour passed by (but it seemed like eternity) and the car was finally traced and the casualties brought to bay. There was a couple in the car sans their kids. Both were covered in blood and it was difficult to check out for injuries. The forehead of the husband was ragged and the insides were clearly seen. The lady had her left part of the face completely covered in blood and her face was actually skewed. The left nostril had no opening, there was no trace of left cheek and a part of the jaw bone was jutting out!!!! This was it… I couldn’t stop myself from pukeing!! After all you don’t come across such accidents every time in life…just one dose is enough for lifetime!!!! And to continue explaining my condition makes me feel sick again… so I would rather not..

Its to you!!!

HI guys!! wats up???

This ones a tribute to all of you!! For being with me throug thick and thin.. a support in every possible way!! MISS you guys like hell! miss our dys spent together!! dey were ausumn fun! OH !! our school life!!!

I know this wuld be the stupidest way im putting on my emotions and i know u wuld be thiking like.. "donna's gone nuttss.. exposing her feelings in such a way...damn her"..

but guys its juz dat i LOVE you!! and want you to know dat!!!

Even now dat we are away from each oter...... we actully are together!! thee geographical distances can never seperate us!!!

to our friendship!! cheers!!!!

HAUNTED!!!

mmmmm its been like 3 days now that I’m being haunted!!! Well to be on the point, let’s say, it’s been near about a year now. It all started when I checked out this trailer of a film, untitled, on net. It seemed so chilling that I dint even realize that I had goose bumps all over me. I got so engrossed in the 2min trailer that I had promised myself in that very minimal time that I’m going to check this movie out anyhow. The two-minute show was not enough to fulfill my hunger. I needed more!!!! Just the hint of its taste would never appease my appetite. So I get on my expedition, searching everything I could to get the best of it. Not soon enough I knew that the film was adapted and named after a novel ‘Twilight’ written by Stephene Meyer. I venched to grab hold of this book but in wain!!!!! I searched the net, the libraries, the book stores… nothing had STEPHENE… It was probably very apt that I might give in to this strange obsession if it was left unheard…And so a friend of mine bought this book for me, afraid I might loose myself…
Three days past now I sat back to quench my thirst… I slowly took in the book….smelling in the aroma….slaking my desire….
The tale revolved around the love story of a vampire and a beautiful girl. The description was so vivid…so real and yet very imaginative. Every line teased me to read…every page beckoned me to be opened.. And I, not even for a second, tried to stop myself.
The LOVE was so true, despite the differences. The expressions were so impeccable…. Their beauty so divine…The story so immaculate!!!! I could feel myself being a part of them. The very devotional love of a mortal for an immortal caught me into its charm.

~“I love you, you are my LIFE now”~
~“Before you Bella, my life was an endless night, very dark, but there were stars-points of light and reason… and then you shot across my life like a meteor. Suddenly everything was on fire: there was brilliancy, there was beauty”~
~“Look after my heart…. I’ve left it with you”~

Couldn’t ever think that a handsome Immortal Vampire could ever propose his love to a beautiful mortal girl with such depths. The book caught my soul!!! And so did the movie.

But still, now that I’ve read the book and checked out the movie, why am I still feeling haunted??? Why do i feel like my quenched obsession is instigating a feeling in me. Something I can’t understand. The picturesque movie scenes, the to-the-life-descriptions in words, the soothing music made me…. makes me feel…something divine and beautiful, something I have never felt before!!!! It’s confusing me now.
Why isnt this feeling of being haunted vanishing, even after I’ve shhhhhhhed my obsession?????? Its feels just the same as i felt before i caught hold of the book.. i think i otta check out its sequel!!!

STRICTLY GIRLS!!!

HEYA girls!!!! ohk this post is on a short survey i'd done after I broke up with my Boy friend!! The survey includes all kinds of girls... the ones in love~~~~the ones deprived of love~~~~ the ones fresh in love~~~~and the ones sore of love!!!! So go on and read my short thesis on LOVE and GUYS!! but please keep to the warning!! STRICTLY GURLS!!

10 COMMANDEMENTS

for thoes

in

LOVE

1. NEVER TRUST GUYS

2. GUYS are DOGS!!! (yah i knw u agree) ;P

3. NEVER be the FIRST to say 'I LOVE YOU' in a RELATION!!!!

4. NEVER EXPECT anything from GUYS!!!

5. DONT get SERIOUS in a RELATION

6. DONT MISINTERPRET their 'I LOVE YOUs' as COMMITMENTS!!!

7. NEVER be the FIRST to KISS!!!

8. KEEP RECORD of every minute details with EVIDENCES!!! (u might need them in future, taken accord to the 'oh i never did that's' as their only answer when confronted for a clear all)

9. ALWAYS REMEMBER, the ratio of population of men is more than women...

SO THERE'S ALWAYS SOMEONE FOR YOU!!!!

10. TO GET RID OF A GUY........

.....

....

GET CLOSE TO HIM!!!!!!

Girls we are precious. Dont let our emotions be eroded by some sensless fool of a boy!!!

I hope you agree with my conclusions!! and yah your free to add your own point of views!!!

And NOW I believe

I have always believed in God!!! As a child, when left alone, I would pray for God to be with me. And I was never left unheard. Then for me, there was only one God… the Almighty. I had the least idea then that, as I will grow up, I will be forced to believe that different people have different gods. But what I dint understand was when God made us all alike with two hands, two legs, two eyes, two ears, one stomach, one brain, one heart, one nose…then why should we pray different Gods??? Nevertheless I kept my faith in Him and wished everyone did the same.
With increase in my maturity level, I got to interpret that the world was divided, as in literally segregated, on the basis of who prays who???? There were Priests, Sufis, Monks, Fathers, claiming to be the gods own messengers, forcing the world to carve up on the basis of their religion, caste, creed, faith. I could not understand that the so-called gods-messengers could actually create a rift amongst his very own people. And so my belief in god abridged.
The final blow came when a little look around me made it evident that God had left this place long ago and its now being ruled only by some hard hearted bozos who think of their religion and god to be the supreme. So much so that they are ready to kill the believers of other gods. Now I don’t believe in god nomore. Not after understanding that believing in him is the cause of the death of many. A little peep into the world of today is perfect enough to understand that Darwin’s theory of survival of the fittest is no more applicable. Its survival of the cruel, brutal, selfish….which is making rounds these days.

Now all I kinder in me is a wish that along with me there should be many who want to believe in something, something untamable by human mind and yet predominant in its existence. I believe in that thing, which the ever-inquisitive human mind can never conquer. No electronic machine, scientific equipments, religious rituals, holy sacraments can ever defeat in what I believe. Cause now I believe in the ultimate power of truth, love, trust, and faith, HUMANITY!!!!

Strength

Maybe the boat sank
But who says I cant swim????
Maybe the line is too far
But its not away from propinquity...
Maybe the truth is too harsh
But it aint difficult to believe.
No matter how long the course is,
or how gruelling it seems
With my loved ones as my strength
I am sure I will win!!!!

Serenade

I don't know what love is?

I don't know how it feels?

because the world so harsh

Infidelities at power

have made a beast

of what once was me.

I wish to live for once

away from the clutches,

the bonds the world has on me.

For once I want to be me

and feel the magic

that love beholds on all...

away with the time,

beneath the shadows

holding your hands

lost in your embrace

and the love it conceals,

sink into the debts of your eyes

to search that eternal rose

which, they say

is the most precious of all...

And yes, it is a priceless jewel I posses.

The zenith of our togetherness,

I cannot say,

how difficult it will be.

I'll have to desert my love

at times

for peace and solemnity.

But forget you must not

that your seeds of love

have bloomed into me

because now I know what love is

and now I know how it feels......

What am I????

Am I a Word??
Maybe a fantasy.
There are many answers in me,
For now I am a question to me.

The depths of the Seas and heights of the skies,
The buds of the springs and sight of the horizon,
They say
Conceals within
The mysteries unknown
To the living soul.

What mystery is, I know not
For it is concealed somewhere within me

Harsh autumn winds and the merciless sun,
The miseries of the rich, the wails of the poor,
The cries of the helpless, the terror of the scared
Will one day erode me
And then within my crust what hides
Will make itself known to the world at large
But not me
For I would be eternally one
With the great ALMIGHTY.

What is LOVE????

well what exactly is love????
Its the unexplainable feeling, emotion, reaction..... between two subjects which have a heart and soul. Love can be the patience of the father towards his stubborn son. Love can be the understanding of the mother towards the unheard troubles of her daughter. Love can be the longing of a girl to play with her pets. Love can be the gardener's tender whispers with his trees. Love can be the bonding between the friends. Love can be seen in the scoldings of the teacher on her tot. The eyes of the lioness describe her love for her cubs. Love is in the loneliness. Love happens when you try to understand someone. Love is in the hand held out for the helpless. Love is the silent talks through the eyes of the lovers. Love is the impeccable faith in the supreme. Love is in the touch of the mother. Love is in the tears of the beloved. Love is in the memories of the past. Love is what will help humanity to be immortal......

Love happens when you can completely understand the feelings of your beloved, even when he speaks in a language unknown to you!!!!!!

CONTRAST

OPPOSITES ATTRACT..


My physics teacher taught this to me. The idea of opposites struck to me so cool that i started enjoying its presence in my life. And so from the experiments of the kissing magnets in the laboratory i started my so called phase of CONTRASTER.


The power of the opposites slowly became quite evident in my life. Every happening of my life bought with it an essence of the "contrasts". And soon as i learnt to join the links of my life, i saw myself clutched between right and wrong, trust and betrayal, love and hatred, maturity and foolishness, friends and foes....


so much for the love of science!!!!!


Earlier it dint seem to be of any trouble. On the contrary i enjoyed linking my life with the most famous phrase in the world of Science. I would dodge between the opposites to bring in that adventurous feeling in my life. But slowly with the lapse of time....the literary meaning of CONTRAST dawned on my life. The velocity of the opposites got more strong, and i got sucked deeper and deeper in the mesh.

Life became, well what can i say, cruel happening ever happened to me. There were nights when I would sit and cry, deprived of love and there would be nights when i would cry thinking why people loved me so much. 'Contrast' that's what I have always experienced.

When life gives you something, it also offers with it a hidden option which, no doubt, is the total contrast of the first. And at times (in my case, most times) this 'hidden option' railroads you in such a way that you are left with only one option of DO OR DIE cause the stakes on each side are very risky. This turn in someones life is generally termed as DILEMMA by most grown-up. But I call it MY LIFE.
Now that might bring some morbid thoughts into your mind about me!!!! But thats the way my life is.
well Now.. NOW.. that i have declared my thesis on the opposites openly, I was told by the grown-up that to understand life, I must have a straight mind. But what they actully ment was that 'I am confused'. Well then confused it is!!!!
Right from choosing the clothes to be worn to choosing the right friend, i have to saught out my mind over a thousands of contrasting questions which unwantedly arise in my mind. Will my decision be accepted by my parents? will my friends understand me or not?? Is it mature or foolish? Is it the right or wrong? Will it help me gain trust or betrayal? WIll I make my loved ones happy or sad?
whow!! confused.. or rather screwed, I might sound. A rather apt word would be 'CONTRASTER'
18 yrs of my life, I have battled between the contrasts to understand life and the ones I love. I wish to keep on the struggel and cherish a hope that I reach the phase I call 'grown-up'.

P.S. my answers to every contrast question have helped me learn a worhtwhile leson